Love Styles

I recently read a book entitled, How We Love.  The authors suggest that we love our children most often how we were loved as children.  So for example, if there was a lot of affection shown to you as a child, you tend to do the same with your child.  It is important to know our love style so that if there are areas we are not doing so well in, we can improve in those spaces and become more secure in our attachments.  Often, we have wounds from our past and we must stop that unhealthy cycle and make sure we are giving our children a secure and safe feeling of love and commitment.  

The authors suggest that “comfort” is an important word in our love styles.  Do you remember a time as a child when you felt real comfort?  A time when something happened and your parent was there to offer supportive comfort to you so that it eased the stressful situation.  Certainly, we can overdo anything with our children because they need to experience some pain in their life, but to be able to not erase the pain, but offer comfort through the pain.  That is the key to offering secure love for them.  Modeling for them how to handle stressors in their life with strength and courage.  

Good food for thought to make sure we are loving and supporting our children in ways that let them know they can always count on their family in the good times and not so good times.