Magic Formulas

There is a new parenting book out and it is called, Childproof by Julie Lowe. The difference in her book and many parenting books is Julie talks about there really are no tried and true formulas. Now that does not sit well with me because I really like to have a method or outline for what needs to be accomplished and how to get there. One reason I like a formula is I am a task oriented person. Give me a task and I will get it done. I think Julie's point in her book is each family and each child is unique and what works for one may not work for another. We know this to be true if we have two children- definitely discipline techniques that worked for the first one must be adapted and molded for the second child. So the beauty of all this is God created us to be relational and that includes with our children. We must know them, know how they are wired and know their personality. Then we must recognize how to win their heart so that we can have intimate conversation and relationship on their terms. Please hear me, you are still the parent and are in control but doesn't it just make sense to approach your child with sensible psychology that works? We must also remember our parenting must shift as they grow up. When they begin exercising their will (and they will), try to see it as an opportunity for growth for you and your child and not as a battle to be won. You may win if you raise your voice loud enough or put them in time out enough, but at what cost have you won? You are raising an adult and though there is no magic formula, know your child and their heart and find the magic that works for your child.